Inside Bell's Brain

I have recently listened to a series of lessons by David Shannon on 1 Corinthians 13.  (Thanks, Whitney, for the recommendation!)  And I must say, I've never heard it presented in this much detail and with this much clarity about the charge to Christians to practice agape love.  Brother Shannon talks about how we've given 1 Corinthians 13 the title of "the love chapter" with but a cursory understanding of the depths of what God is really asking us to do.  I haven't finished the series of lessons yet (I plan to very soon), but what I've learned so far has been quite insightful, and it's inspired me to take those thoughts down the road of this post today... Back when I was single, I saw a clever post that suggested whenever you think you've found "the one", insert his name into 1 Corinthians 13 wherever you read the word "love" or "charity".  So in one of my journaling Bibles, I did this using my own name in the place of &q

I've struggled with my weight my entire life.  Well, since around fourth or fifth grade we'll say.  About the time that I began steroids for my asthma.  Which made me gain weight.  And then I learned to self-medicate the discouragement I felt for being "fat" with more food.  And then kids are bullies, so then I ate more food to soothe those wounds...  And then I lost the weight in high school.  And then there was mono my freshman year and I ballooned up again.  And then I lost the weight again in college.  And then there was my divorce and working three jobs while I was in grad school.  And then I lost weight yet again, even became a certified fitness instructor... and then this depression happened.  To be honest, I still have to fight the temptation to self-medicate using food. As a society, we have certain assumptions about people we judge as overweight.  People tend to assume they eat all day with little to no exercise, and furthermore

I was eating lunch with a friend recently, and of course, we were talking about the upcoming school year.  She knows how this past year was a struggle for me personally and professionally as I learned to balance my life and navigate my health and well-being.  She and I both expressed our concerns over all the decisions being made in light of the COVID situation, but neither of us really had a better answer or alternative.  There are risks and problems no matter what the powers that be decide, so we just have to have faith. I told her I was thankful for my summer and glad for all the projects I've been able to work on.  I told her that I appreciated the break and change of pace, and while I wanted to stretch summer a little longer (as teachers always do), I was ready to try again.  I was (I am) ready for a new year and to put this past year behind.  Then I blurted, "I am just ready to be successful again this year... but I don't even know what that looks like." I had t

I think people are well-meaning. At least I would like to think that. And with the statistics about mental health in 2020, you would really think more people would be educated and informed about how to be sensitive during mental, emotional, spiritual crises. Yet I find that most people who’ve not experienced these traumas first hand are inept at helping those of us in the throes of despair.  That’s why I think people mean well, but just don’t know what to do. Most people don’t say to themselves, “I wonder what I could say to him/her that could be the final straw?  What will really make him/her finally pull the trigger?  What will make this person compound guilt upon guilt until they’re buried in shame and cannot recover?” That’s not to say that, unfortunately, there aren’t people who really try to rub it in. That breaks my heart, but it’s not my point.  I think most people want to do better. They just don’t know how. So I compiled a list of things that either helped me or would have he

It's been a long long while since I tackled the "lies I believe" series I started, but I felt like the time was right to explore it a little more.  I've enjoyed blogging again and putting so many different ideas out there, and I think it's healthy and wise to discuss some of these societal pressures.  Communication and authenticity are essential for overcoming any obstacles... including these lies we've sold ourselves. As I mentioned earlier, I was reading Brene Brown's book Daring Greatly , and it really resonated with me.  I would highly recommend it, and I can't wait to get my hands on my next title from her.  But in this book, she discusses the concepts of vulnerability and scarcity.  One of the most powerful quotes that struck me was about how we live in a scarcity mindset.  The first things we think upon waking up are that "there's not enough time" and "I didn't get enough sleep".  I'm SO incredibly guilty of this,

Picking up right where I left off in Abigail’s account in 1 Samuel 25, I'm adding to our list of observations about this inspiring wife. 💛 Abigail was a peacemaker.   Ouch!  The Bible warns about being a contentious wife, but am I truly a peacemaker like Abigail?  She was willing to accept the blame herself for something her worthless scoundrel of a husband Nabal did.  She took the blame for his offenses.  And although Christ hasn't yet been on the scene in this Old Testament account, what a Christlike thing to do.  Her heart was pure, and she was truly living by the admonition to live peaceably with all men as much as is within her power (Rom. 12:18).  Do I help my husband seek and maintain peace in our relationship and in our family?  Do I seek to maintain peace, or am I a contentious wife?  Am I willing to take blame, even when something isn't my fault, or do I need to "prove something" and "be right"? 💛 Abigail was persuasive.  Once she begins spe

I’ve jumped forward quite a bit chronologically speaking to study Abigail. She is perhaps one of my most favorite Bible women because I understand to some degree what it was like to be married to a Nabal. (For those of you who don’t know my whole story, I am NOT referring to my current husband.  I was married before and that marriage ended scripturally, enabling me to be with the man of God who has my heart now.) Abigail’s account in 1 Samuel 25 is a relatively short read, but she has so many remarkable qualities that an in-depth study reveals just how far I have left to grow and mature. Her very name means “cause for joy” or "my father's joy". We can capture so many powerful truths from her account that it’s hard to focus in on just one or two things. For this lesson, I’m going to alliterate our study to highlight some of her most poignant characteristics and ask application questions to challenge myself to grow as a wife. Because there's SO much to learn about Abig

Dear sister who won’t keep your clothes on, I know what you’re going to say. If men struggle, that’s their problem. They need to learn to control themselves. But I for one have never been in my husband’s mind or body, or any other man for that matter, so I don’t know how hard it is. And you don’t either. You assume they’re wired like us and they’re not. Because we were designed differently, and God instilled in them a visual sensory level that’s so far beyond ours. I can’t understand. I’ve asked God to help me try. But I keep coming away more and more frustrated.  You see, some men - even ones who grow up in the church - don’t have good influences or examples when it comes to sexual purity. Some of them really struggle. And you know what happens to their future girlfriends/wives?    They struggle too. They’re suddenly on a rollercoaster of fear, jealousy, and insecurity that they didn’t sign up for.  Sister, when you choose selfishness and decide to walk around half naked and flaunt yo

One thing about summer is that it does give some extended time & daylight hours to be able to work on projects.  Especially during quarantine when you’re still mostly staying at home except for the essentials.   This summer is the first summer that my hubs and I are in our home together.  We’ve done things all throughout the year since we moved in here officially in September, but I actually remembered to take pictures of the summer projects!  (Of course, I’ve searched and searched for the “before” images from when I moved in here during my undergrad but I can’t find them anywhere!  And I was too excited to snap any images before diving into the painting.) I’ve had my heart set on a nightstand for the front porch to do all cutesy with the plants and stuff, but my impatient self couldn’t wait so I went with this idea instead.  I bought two crates from Home Depot, chalk painted both in two different colors, and used antiquing glaze (thanks, Chance & Kellie!) when I was finished.